Showing posts with label elvis. Show all posts
Showing posts with label elvis. Show all posts

Apr 28, 2007

Captain America: Dead and Loving It!

Captain America, unlike Tupac, Biggie, and Jim Morrison has returned from the dead.

Unless you've been under a rock, you'd know that Captain America was murdered by a sniper in March.


I would say he got assassinated, but that depends on the interpretation.

If we perform a Chris Rock analysis, maybe his ass just got shot:

When we got no leaders, when something happens we make (things) bigger than it is. It's big, but don't make it bigger than it is. I'm watching the news, and like, 'Tupac Shakur was assassinated. Biggie Smalls, assassinated. Struck down by assassin's bullets.' I'm like, 'No, they wasn't!' Martin Luther King was assassinated. Malcolm X was assassinated. John F. Kennedy was assassinated. Them two n***** got shot.

So, did Captain America get assassinated or shot?

CBS refers to Cap's death as a result of a struggle between national security and civil liberties.

ABC called it an assasination.

(Un)Fortunately, the question is moot.

Captain America is ALIVE.

Not flesh-eating zombie "alive":

Not doing a duet on American Idol with Celine Dion "alive".

Not on an island like Tupac "alive".

Good ol' Cap was busted with a burrito in his pants, groping women and getting his drink on.

Tupac, Kurt Cobain, Elvis, Biggie and tons of other dead guys could learn a lot from a true "dead" American hero.

---------

How could Biggie, Tupac, or Elvis top Captain America's performance? What do you think is next for Cap?

Apr 27, 2007

Richard Gere: Sexual Trailblazer

When you hear the words "sexual trailblazer", who do you think of?

Al Kinsey?

Nerd.

Sigmund Freud? Punk ass.

Elvis?Poseur.

Madonna?
Oh, Hell to the No!

THE Sexual Trailblazer?

Richard Tiffany Gere.

The recent Indian furor with Shilpa Shetty may seem out of character for a humble Buddhist, but behind that facade lies a man who has taken sexual issues and shoved it in the face of prudishness.

In Looking for Mr. Goodbar, he played a jealous and possessive playa-playa.
In American Gigolo, he was the first major Hollywood actor to engage in full frontal nudity.
Pretty Woman brought prostitution to the mainstream...in a Disney movie!

Elvis and Madonna may have had envelope pushing controversies in the past, but what did they do last week?

Elvis came back from the dead to sing with Celine Dion.
Madonna visited Malawi.

Richard Gere, on the other hand, was chilling on The Daily Show cracking jokes while he's facing arrest in India.

Richard Gere may be wanted in India for "transgressing all limits of vulgarity", but he's not afraid. He's been here before. And if he can face the wrath of Rambo and the scorn of society through a vicious gerbil rumor, he can weather this storm.

Best believe that.

Add to Google
Google