May 22, 2007

Paris Hilton: The Next Jerry Falwell?

Through the magic of photojournalism, TMZ reveals what many have hoped for and others have feared: Paris Hilton has found religion.

Do you know what this means?

With Jerry Falwell's death, there's a void.

And Paris will fill it.

She was raised Catholic, but so was Martin Luther. And look what he did.

In fact, any deceased spiritual leader would trade places with Paris Hilton. In a heartbeat.

Don't believe me? Pick a dead spiritual leader and we'll conduct a seance right now and ask him/her/it "Would you switch places with Paris Hilton?".

But you won't conduct a seance, because you know that everyone wants to be like Paris. Lazy eye and all.

She didn't wait for incarceration to begin her work, she's studying now. She thought she'd have 45 days, but is only going to get 23. But don't worry, Paris will make due.

What are her religious plans?
Which denomination will she follow?
What does she have in store for us?

Who knows!

Just keep her away from Bert.

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What do you think is Paris Hilton's plan? Do you think she even read the Bible?

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